I’m excited to bring Caroline’s story to you! Her story shows that you don’t have to choose between living in the city or being able to retire early. You just have to be very intentional about making smart money decisions along the way in order to get there!

Living in New York City is not cheap. If anything, it’s the opposite of cheap - it’s ridiculously expensive! So expensive that many people choose to leave the city in order to live more affordable lives. That thought never even crossed our minds though. It wasn’t an option. My husband and I grew up in the city. Our families live in the city. And we LOVE this city! We love how convenient everything is, the cultural diversity, and the thriving art scene. There is never a day that goes by that you can’t find a show, fair, or museum to enjoy. This is where we wanted to live, to raise our family.

Affording NYC

With that decision made, we had to figure out how to afford this life - this crazy expensive, but awesome life! The first decision we made was to take on the highest paying jobs we could find early in our career. This ended up being in management consulting. We worked nonstop and traveled constantly! Not only did this allow us to pay off our student loans quickly and max out of 401k’s, we could afford to live right where we wanted - the creative, hip East Village of Manhattan, close to all the major transit hubs and our families!

During this time we had our first daughter and life became really full. My husband and I tried to arrange opposite travel schedules so one of us was home in the evening. When we couldn’t avoid overlapping schedules, our family was right there and able to help. Luckily, we had the money to afford a full-time nanny and the energy to keep going. We stayed in these jobs for about five years, setting us up to be able to downshift to corporate jobs that allowed us more time with our daughter and baby number two! By the time our daughters were 12 and 6 years old I was able to leave my office job adn start a consulting business with a former colleague that allowed me to work flexibly and remotely, and my husband was able to switch to a non-profit job he loved!

While our first jobs helped us set up a solid financial foundation, we needed to be very intentional with our money if we were ever going to be able to retire at age 65! With everything in the city being so expensive and housing prices so high, we needed to live small and be frugal. We had to make our 2-bed, 1-bath, 1,000 square foot apartment in Manhattan comfortable for a family of four.

I was constantly decluttering and questioning every purchase that would be brought into our home. Every nook of our apartment had a purpose, or multiple purposes. I focused on buying groceries in bulk, shopping at flea markets, and using craigslist in order to save money. When we wanted to go out and enjoy the city, instead of paying high prices, I learned to look for bargains and take advantage of Free Admission days. Developing these skills kept our cost of living down in New York City so we could allocate more money towards the future.

Investing In Our Future

Besides maxing out our 401k’s we looked into other ways to invest. I had always been interested in real estate so we decided to try investing in this market. We bought a small weekend house in New Jersey that appreciated well and allowed us to obtain a Home Equity Line of Credit (HELOC) in order to buy our next property. We found two great places in Asheville, NC that we were able to purchase at a low cost and have profitable rent right away. With this investment being a success, we decided to use our profits to expand our real estate portfolios to Jacksonville FL, Indianapolis IN, and Tamarindo, Costa Rica - all places where the numbers worked in our favor!

I like to think of our real estate portfolio as a type of geo-arbitrage. Instead of making money in a high cost-of-living geography and then moving to a lower cost-of-living place, we did geo-arbitrage with our investments - making our money in NYC, but investing elsewhere.

Between our frugality and successful investments, my husband was able to retire last year at the age of 46! We hadn’t set out to retire early, but discovered the possibility as we were moving into our non-corporate way of living. Learning about FIRE gave us the inspiration to keep making financial decisions that would allow us to have the flexibility we desired.

Our FIRE Life

As our oldest left for college and our youngest was starting high school, my husband and I were talking about how we wanted to live in this new stage of life. We found ourselves less tied to Manhattan. We love NYC, but we didn’t feel like we needed to be in the middle of it all.

We ended up finding a comparable 2-bed, 1-bath, 1,000 square foot apartment in the Bronx we fell in love with. It was in the Riverdale area near the NY Botanical Garden in a lush, quiet, close-knit neighborhood. To make it even better, it was an estate sale, so there was a big discount! This place was a fraction of the cost of our Manhattan home and would allow us to still get into the heart of the city easily. It was an easy decision for us to move and we are enjoying our new home the change of scenery.

Looking back on this journey it’s easy to ask - Could we have moved to the Bronx earlier and retired earlier? Maybe, but choosing to stay where we really wanted to be helped us figure out our priorities and forced us to make smart money decisions early on. Had we moved out of the Manhattan we may not have been so focused. We may not have been able to retire early. Choosing to stay in Manhattan when the girls were little allowed us to be a quick walk or ride to school, activities, and family. That was completely worth it for us. We have enjoyed our journey along the way to FIRE - and that’s really important too!

Do you have a freedom story you would like to share? We would love to hear from you! Submit your story here!

After visiting Costa Rica in July, Chris and I knew we wanted to return with our girls. We had fallen in love with Nosara and decided to come up with a plan to return to the little surfing town.

A Second Home

We found an Airbnb that seemed perfect for our family. The Sea Shack had two bedrooms, a kitchen, an outdoor living space, and a pool. We booked this home for four nights over the week of Thanksgiving. As our departure date arrived we were bursting with excitement. When our flight landed it felt surreal to be back. As our shuttle dropped us off in Nosara my heart filled with joy. And as we walked up to the Sea Shack, I felt a comfort that I can only explain as home.

This home, our home for the next 4 days, was tucked back in the jungle off the main road. We could easily walk to shops, restaurants, a small organic grocery store, and a fruit stand selling the tastiest mangoes the girls have ever eaten. A little further down the road the beach welcomed us with soft sand and waves the girls loved jumping in. Hearing their giggles as a wave almost knocked them down was music to my ears. There is nothing better when you see pure joy in your children’s faces.

While we loved the beach, we spent the majority of our time at the house. We didn’t go zip lining, take surfing lessons, or go horseback riding. Instead, we just lived and loved.

One of our main goals with this trip was for Chris to work while in Costa Rica. We had talked last winter about someday living in Costa Rica for an extended period of time, but if Chris couldn’t get a good internet connection for remote work, that wouldn’t be an option. So for three days Chris planned to be working 8 hours on his computer while the girls and I figured out our days. Our outdoor living room became Chris’ office space while the girls jumped in the pool and I read a book with my legs dangling in the water.

When the girls were taking a break from the pool, I was usually walking to the grocery store, to the farmer’s market, or the fruit stand. This was a dream come true for me - grabbing fresh fruit down the street on a daily basis is the best!

When Chris finished work for the day we would go to a restaurant or make a simple dinner. We ate at our outdoor kitchen table as the sun set and we waited to be greeted by howler monkeys. The monkeys never stopped by, but we did hear them a few times.

After we cleared the table, we pulled out a game for the five of us to play. Our favorite ended up being a card game called Fab Fiction. The goal was to weave a story out of the words on the card. As we passed the card around the table we added crazy plot lines, funny characters, and filled the air with laughter.

Our time in Costa Rica was short and we were sad when it was time to pack up. Chris had successfully worked while in Costa Rica. I had learned how to navigate the town. I wasn’t ready to go. I wanted to learn more Spanish. I wanted to walk back down to the beach. I wanted to see the monkeys that hadn’t stopped by yet. I wanted to buy my girls more fresh mangoes. I wanted to experience more life here.

As we boarded the plane to come back home we were excited to see our family and friends, but we were also leaving a part of our hearts in Costa Rica. Chris turned to me at one point and said, “I feel like we have two different lives. One in Wisconsin and one in Costa Rica. When we are in Wisconsin our life in Costa Rica is on pause. And when we return we pick right back up where we left.” I couldn’t have agreed more! We are hoping that the next time we return to Costa Rica, the space we like to think of as our second home, we’ll be able to stay for an entire month! There will be more to navigate, and more to learn, but I’m excited to take on it all on!

Our Budget

Since this is a personal finance blog, I’ll also share our budget for this trip. We planned a $6,000 budget for a one week vacation in Costa Rica. This included all of our transportation, food, shelter, and any other expenses during this one week.

A brief review of our trip:

• Saturday November 17: Flew into San Jose, Stayed the night,
• Sunday November 18: Took a shuttle to Nosara, Stayed in Nosara for 4 nights
• Thursday November 22: Took a shuttle to Monteverde, Stayed the night
• Friday November 23: Took a shuttle to San Jose, Stayed the night
• Saturday November 24: Flew home

We ended up spending a total of $5426.00:

Two December’s ago, I finally took my friend Paul’s lead and spent the month offline. I checked Instagram occasionally, but the blog, Twitter, etc. all went quiet. Not surprisingly, I can still remember moments from that month vividly. Without the distractions of needing to keep up with what was happening on the internet, I made memories with people in real life. Baking days with friends, playing with the dogs, relocating to Squamish, walking through heavy snow, going up the gondola with my mom and brother. That’s not to say it was all simple and peaceful (the holidays rarely are, at least not entirely). But I remember it.

I don’t remember last December. Actually, the one memory that sticks out is breaking down crying and calling Anthony from the floor of my living room. I eventually laughed at how ridiculous the situation would look to an outsider (grown woman laying on her rug sobbing). But that’s what I remember. I was neck-deep in book launch tasks and had no idea what I was doing. Being my first book, it was completely foreign territory. I couldn’t see where the task trail was going to lead me, but I was running down it at an uncomfortable pace. It didn’t feel good, and it wasn’t sustainable. Unfortunately, because that’s the pace I set, I felt like I had to keep it up—and did so for five full months.

You know how the rest of this story goes. After doing more than 100 interviews in the first four months of the year, I took May and June off to travel and spend some time with myself. Then I took the summer off to properly sit still, think, and begin to process what happened in the first half of the year. In that time, I decided to stop blogging altogether, and opted to write a newsletter instead. My original intention was to write this weekly, but I missed a few here and there while travelling, and have no guilt or regrets about that. I wrote what felt good, when it felt good. And right now, I feel more like myself than ever for one simple reason: I changed the rules.

I didn’t change the rules for everyone, but I changed the rules for myself. The rules about what I thought a blogger was supposed to do after writing a book. The rules about what I thought a first-time author was supposed to do before/after its release. The rules about what I thought I was supposed to do next. And currently, I’m changing all kinds of rules about how I’m living my life. It hasn’t been easy (as you know from my stories, but more importantly from your own). It’s hard to change stories you’ve been told, and stories you’ve told yourself, about who/what/when/where/why/how we live this life. But there’s one thing I keep telling myself that makes it a little easier.

This thing we’re doing? Living, working, challenging ourselves, etc. It’s all an adventure. Despite the fact that it feels like we are living in a time where everything is right/wrong, there is actually no right/wrong way to do this stuff. We have to try new things and learn, and take new trails and see where it all goes. More simply put: we have to be open and considerate—of ourselves and others. Sometimes that means starting down one path and realizing it’s the wrong one for you. That’s ok. With every step you take, you’ll find new paths open up. And no matter which path you take next, you’ll never be able to see the outcome. Just stick to a pace that feels good and you’ll find your way.

As you begin to think about what your goals or intentions might be for the rest of 2018 or early 2019, remember that you’re in control. You can change the pace or the rules to meet you or your family’s needs. If you do what feels good for you and those around you, there’s really no way you can go wrong. Again, you may not feel certain of that at the beginning. But eventually, you’ll find you have a personal map of your life and experiences. It’s only after you’ve taken steps forward, though, that you can look back and connect the dots to see where you came from. So don’t be afraid to take that first step. It’s the hardest one to take, but it’s also the closest.

Thank you for joining me for this season of the newsletter. I’ll be taking December off to travel a bit, spend time with friends and family, and think about what I want the future of the newsletter to look like.

Before signing off, I want to share quotes from two of the most meaningful pieces of content I’ve read this year. First, on the topic of consuming . . .

“While choice is infinite, our lives have time spans. We can’t live every life. We can’t watch every film or read every book or visit every single place on this sweet earth. Rather than being blocked by it, we need to edit the choice in front of us. We need to find out what is good for us, and leave the rest. We don’t need another world. Everything we need is here, if we give up thinking we need everything.” – Matt Haig, from my favourite book of 2018: Notes on a Nervous Planet

And on the topics of both consuming and creating . . .

“We are porous, highly susceptible creatures whose words and actions are affecting each other constantly. We’re taking cues from each other in every moment about who and how to be. The consequences of this are pretty massive. Everything is contagious. Every word, every action, every tweet, every Facebook post is a contribution to the collective. Every encounter affects us in subtle and not-so-subtle ways, and then that affects our next encounter, and our next, and so on and so on. We are wildly underestimating the impact we have on those around us. Those of us who are visible—and by that I really mean all of us—have a beautiful and holy opportunity. We can be contagiously good.” – Josh Radnor <3

That’s all for now, friend. Be kind, be safe and have a beautiful month! I’ll see you back here in 2019.

x Cait

PS – I’m signing off from the newsletter, but not Instagram! From now until December 24th, I’m doing a daily post using the hashtag #tistheseasontobemindful. If you’re on there, feel free to say hi and follow along. I’ll be giving away a few bundles of books, too. It should be a fun month. :)

Back in the day, people were encouraged to put money aside for retirement. Retirement was deemed the time when you no longer worked. Generally, this was at age 65. Why? I’m guessing that for many people, their aging bodies wouldn’t be able to continue at the 9-5 pace much longer. They needed to slow down and take care of themselves. And soon, they would hit the point when they wouldn’t be able to physically work. The money they set aside needed to be able to cover their living expenses when they could no longer earn a paycheck.

We accepted this way of life. People found jobs they could stay at for 45+ years and figured out how to enjoy life. Things may not have been perfect; but it was simple, predictable, and safe. When it was time to retire, we were thankful that we had been able to set aside part of our paycheck.

Then something changed. People started wanting more out of life. They didn’t want to work the 9-5 until age 65. Why wait to travel until you’re too old to enjoy those experiences? We started craving more time, or at least more time during our younger years to do the things we enjoyed.

I wonder… Is this because our expectations for life changed or corporate’s expectations for us changed? I’m guessing it’s both.

Losing Work-Life Balance

I remember hearing about people who worked 8 hours 5 days a week, received a certain amount of vacation days, a pension, and a really nice healthcare benefit. Slowly, these incentives started to fade away. Employees were asked and soon expected to work longer hours. They were even encouraged not to use their vacation days. The pension disappeared and the healthcare benefits got worse each year. Companies started expecting their employees to live for the company’s success - working them to exhaustion and keeping them from their families. Can I say that corporate America lost its humanity?

We let this go on for a while, but as employees got burnt by their employers, we started questioning whether it was all worth it. We started looking for a change. We looked for a solution. One that would allow us to enjoy our lives more.

Solution Number One: Early Retirement

We weren’t able to fight against the long work days, the lack of vacation time, or the diminishing pension. The one thing we could control - our retirement date. Incomes were healthy and if we could just optimize how we saved, we could put away enough to retire early. We could take that vacation before age 65!

Retiring a few years earlier wasn’t enough though. We were still burnt out. We came to hate our jobs. We needed to get out sooner! This is when we learned about Mr. Money Mustache retiring at age 30.

Solution Number Two: MMM Retirement

We decided we wanted the Mr. Money Mustache retirement. But this was hard. We had student loans, credit card debt, mortgages, and families. We tried budgeting. We tried fighting against impulse purchases. While we eliminated debt and became more intentional, we found ourselves past the age of 30. If we couldn’t retire by age 30, we wanted the next best thing - retire as early as possible! But how were we going to make this happen?

Solution Number Three: The Hustle

We started hearing about other people retiring early. They were making it happen at age 40! How were they doing it? We learned that they had buckled down and began to hustle. Not only did they work their 40+ hour job, but they began to look for other ways to make money outside of their day job. This allowed them to pay off their debts faster, to put more money away towards retirement and increase their net worth.

Basically, if we were to hustle we needed to invest more time and energy into making more money. This would finally allow us to retire earlier. Having learned this, our desire for early retirement became all-consuming. The more we worked, the more we made, the sooner we could retire. But as time went on, we found ourselves burning out again.

A New Solution: Let Go

Here’s the thing, FIRE was never meant to be about the hustle. (Tweet this )

People look at what Mr. Money Mustache has achieved and gloss over the entire premise of his story. It was never about the money, it was about living by his values. It was about making choices, such as not taking on debt. It was about figuring out his personal priorities and sticking to them; not letting the world cloud their judgment. He and his wife looked at their life, at their paycheck, and decided to be intentional from the beginning. They knew their values, the life they wanted, and figured out how to live life on their terms in the 9-5. Along the way, they realized that they could retire early.

What if we did this instead? What if we worked our 9-5 and talked about our own values. What if we didn’t focus on early retirement, but on living a fulfilling life now and in the future. Not a glamorous life, but one where we turn our focus back towards our loved ones come 5 pm, where we look for work that fulfills us instead of burns us out. And instead of making FI our life goal and getting burnt by the hustle, we slow down. What would happen if we let go of FIRE so that we can reevaluate our goals and find balance?

Maybe, just maybe, we won’t get burnt out anymore.

Our eight-year-old daughter shared this with me when she came home from school the other day:

“Dad…I told my friends at school how much money I have and they laughed at me…“

At the time, she had $1.28. Many of her friends told her they had $40 or more.

Who knew keeping up with the Joneses started in the second grade? (Tweet this )

I’ve got three daughters that are experts at wrapping me around their fingers. There was a big part of me that wanted to be the “hero of the moment” and slide her a couple twenties. But that’d be counter to everything we’ve been trying to teach our kids about money.

We’ve been working on teaching our kids about the value of a hard-earned dollar. So I used this as an opportunity to circle back on the lesson once again.

Our children have the opportunity to earn money through “extra chores”. That may range from $0.50 for wiping down the kitchen table to several dollars for cleaning a bathroom.

Our daughter explained that her friends get money as handouts or a regular allowance.

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with allowances per se. They are great for teaching some money lessons (saving, investing, budgeting). But giving your kids a chance to earn their own spending money is wholly different. Let’s see how through an example.

Teach Kids to Earn

Our daughter told us something else on the day she had her money discussion at school. She also told us she wanted to buy a stationery packet from the school catalog. Envelopes, letters, stickers, and stamps - all in a cool designer case. The cost was $10.50 and she had $1.28, meaning she needed to earn another $9.22.

Knowing she had a long way to go, our daughter lobbied us to give her extra chores so she could earn the money she needed. The following Saturday, we had a full line-up for her. She wiped down the kitchen table and cleaned the bathroom. She vacuumed the living and dining room. And she cleaned up all her toys (and her sisters’ as well).

Every time she finished a chore, she tallied up how much she had earned. Then she’d figure out how far away she was from her goal before asking for another opportunity.

It took only a few hours before our house was clean and our daughter’s coin purse was full.

As we filled out the catalog order form, the grin on her face lit up the room. She was so proud of herself for the hard work she’d done and for achieving her goal.

As parents, we were proud too. We weren’t only getting caught up around our house. We were parenting - helping our daughter learn important life lessons.

Here are the major lessons our daughter took away from the experience:

Advocate For Yourself

If our daughter hadn’t pushed me to keep finding chores for her, I would have stopped coming up with ideas. I wasn’t going to force her to earn money and achieve her goal. That drive needed to come from her.

When she finishes high school and/or college, she’s going to have to be proactive in finding a job. She is going to have to make resumes, contact recruiters, and sell her abilities to employers.

Once she’s in the workplace, she’s going to need to advocate for her own career advancement - for raises and new jobs.

A part of growing up is learning to advocate for yourself in every aspect of your life.

But we don’t want her to have to learn these lessons the hard way at twenty-two. Learning them in a safe environment at age eight is so much better.

Hard Work Pays Off

Life, in general, has a rule:

If you don’t put in the work, you won’t reap the reward (Tweet this )

Yes, we all know of exceptions. There’s the person who got lucky (or unlucky). Or people who were born into favorable (or unfavorable) situations. But even for those people, there’s some level of correlation between the work you put in and the rewards you reap.

Working for three hours on a Saturday might sound like torture to some kids. But when it’s for a goal you’re passionate about, it’s completely different. Our daughter didn’t complain at any point through the process. She hopped from one job to the next with her eyes on the prize and a proud smile on her face

In the end, her hard work paid off and she was able to make the prize her own.

Know What It’s All For

Once she’d achieved her goal, she asked if I had any more jobs for her. I told her that I’d give her $3.00 to clean her entire bedroom (which she shares with two younger sisters). She peeked in the room, then looked at me and said, “Nah, I’m good for today”.

This is the biggest lesson of all. She learned that there’s a shrinking benefit for every hour of your life you trade for work. Our daughter learned to measure whether work is worth it.

After she had reached her goal, she was ready to take a break and play with her sisters. She’d worked hard, earned enough, and got to order her stationery packet.

The Opportunities Are Out There

Choosing not to take me up on that last offer may have seemed like she was leaving money on the table. But in that decision, our daughter showed some real maturity.

She knows that the kitchen will get dirty again. She knows the carpet will need vacuuming soon. And she knows her sisters will cover the floor with toys before I finish this post. She’s confident that she’ll be able to get more money when she wants it.

If you believe that money is scarce, you’ll spend your entire life working. And you’ll never enjoy the fruits of your labor.

Lifelong Lessons

When she goes back to school, her change purse will be empty but her sense of accomplishment will be full. And if the topic of money comes up with her friends, I’m hoping she’ll remember what she earned and what she learned.

How did your parents teach you about earning? What are you doing to teach your own children?

Thank you to Qoins for sponsoring this story!

Life isn’t easy. It takes perseverance to reach your goals. During the journey there will be small wins and big setbacks, but everything that happens is preparing you for the future. Looking back, Christian can see how his drive to make his dreams a reality helped him start his own business and help others conquer debt!

Losing My Job

After college, I landed a job at a startup in Atlanta, Georgia. I enjoyed my work and started thinking about how I was going to pay off my student loans and credit card debt.

I found myself wondering if there was a simple way to work towards debt freedom without it feeling like a huge burden. I started brainstorming during my lunch breaks and found my passion for debt freedom consuming my evenings. As each day went by, my idea started to take shape. I even met Nate, who shared my vision and became my partner in turning my idea into something real.

While I spent every spare moment working on this project, I found myself at a plateau. I knew that I had the beginnings of an awesome startup, but In order to keep making progress I needed to dedicate more time to it. Unfortunately, I was maxed out.

The only way to gain more time was to leave my job. I wasn’t about to take that leap, but then my boss let me go. He knew I had been working on my own project and this was his way of telling me to go for it. He gave me the nudge I needed to focus on my own startup. He even helped with the transition.

Persevering

While the extra pay did help, it wasn’t going to sustain me. I was still going to need some income to pay the bills while I tried to launch my own startup. As I started the search for a job that would allow me to pay the rent without taking up my days, an old friend reached out about a temporary job. They were looking for a brand ambassador manager. While the hours were long, there was a lot of flexibility and down time. I decided to give it a go and hope for the best. It ended up being a perfect fit, allowing me to focus more on my startup!

Nate and I were making huge progress on the beta version of our business idea when another obstacle threatened to stop our progress. I became really sick with an internal heart infection (endocarditis), a risk factor from previous heart surgeries. There was talk of needing surgery again, but my doctor prescribed me a medication first with the hopes that it would do the trick.

For two miserable months I battled the infection. I couldn’t work. I barely had enough money to pay my rent. My saving grace during this time was that I was still young and under my parents’ health insurance.

Luckily, the medication worked and I slowly started to feel normal again. Going through that scary time gave me a lot of time to think. Did I want to keep going forward with my own startup? I knew I really did! I had gotten through the heart infection; I could certainly get through other obstacles!

It’s been about two months since I made that decision to keep moving forward. Nate and I officially launched our business - Qoins! It’s an App that rounds up your purchases and automatically sends your spare change to pay down your debt! We’ve already been able to help multiple families pay off their debts. I’ve even used it myself to pay off my $4,000 of credit card debt!

A Life Of Preparation

When I was let go I stepped into the unknown. I didn’t know if I would succeed, but I had the confidence to persevere. I knew how to hustle and not give up. I had been doing it all my life.

In elementary school I sold my artwork in order to buy ice cream. In high school I started a lawn care business in order to buy my own truck. In college I found work at a pub crawl in Spain so I could afford my rent. I had never let an obstacle or lack of income stop me before. All those experiences had built up my ability to persevere when the going got tough. It taught me how to navigate obstacles so that I could come out on the other side. Each season helped me get where I dreamed of being - starting my own business and helping people become debt free!

Do you have a freedom story you would like to share? We would love to hear from you! Submit your story here!

As I do every year between Christmas and New Years, I spend quiet time reflecting on the past year of Podia while planning the coming year. It’s really the only time when I can do some really deep thinking.

As I sat down with my notepad this year, and after lots of internal thinking, note taking and writing, I kept coming back to this idea of "doubling down on your strengths" and when it’s time to do that.

For at least the first few years of any startup, so much of product development is about expanding your feature set.

You build what the market wants, you build what your customers want, you build your vision, and you build to stay competitive with your competitors. With a decent plan, you can almost do no wrong. It’s as if there’s a giant dart board full of features and you can throw blindfolded and hit something that works.

Eventually, there comes a time when you’ve whittled down your list and you have a solid understanding of what's working and what's not. It's at that time that you get to shift gears from building a lot of different features that address a lot of different areas of the product to honing in on your strengths.

It's an immensely gratifying feeling because you only get there when you've hit Product Market Fit and you’re growing steadily. You now have focus.

Once you get there, you feel both a sense of relief, but also an intense need to keep building and growing. Yes, you now have the data to support what's next and have decent confidence on how to execute it, but you also worry that you're maybe not quite there yet.

It’s at this point in the road where you need to double down.

Even though I'm writing this with some hesitation, I'm excited to be "doubling down on our strengths" in 2019.

Happy New Year, friends! Popping in to let you know I’m doing an event at Powell’s in Portland, Oregon on January 16th. We’ll be celebrating the release of the paperback version of The Year of Less—as well as the first birthday of the book! I’ll share a bit of my story, but would love to open it up more for Q&A and have some discussions about money, minimalism, being a mindful consumer, and whatever else is on your mind. If you’re local, I would love to see you there! :)

Location: Powell’s City of Books

Address: 1005 W Burnside Street, Portland, OR 97209

Date/Time: January 16, 2019 at 7:30pm

There was a time when we felt stuck. We felt like our dreams and hopes were unattainable. We felt defeated. We struggled during this time in our life (and in our marriage), but we found a way to pull ourselves out of that hard place and into a better financial situation, allowing us to make our dreams a reality. You can do it too - here are 3 steps to help you get started:

Question Everything

One of the first things we did that helped us in our journey was to question everything. When we entered adulthood, we let the world take control of our lives. It told us to focus on our careers instead of our marriage. It told us to impulsively spend our money instead of focusing on our values.

Chris worked long hours and added an MBA program to his schedule. I worked late into the evenings and every other weekend in the fitness world. We spent our paychecks on Pottery Barn furniture and expensive clothing. We never took a vacation or slowed down to enjoy our marriage. Our life became about finding our value in what the world thought of us.

It wasn’t until we became a family of five that we realized we were broken. We had a nice home and a good job. And while we were grateful for this, we found ourselves unhappy. Why? We wanted more time together. At first, it felt like there was nothing we could do. Chris needed to work his 40+ hours. We needed the paycheck.

But what if we didn’t need the paycheck? What would we do? Chris talked about working in a job that allowed flexibility, remote work, and ample vacation time (maybe even entering the world of entrepreneurship). We talked about taking weekday hikes, traveling around the world, and walking our girls to school.

Once we created this vision, a vision that aligned with our own values, we found the strength to question more. Were we handling our money in a way that was leading us in the direction we wanted to go? Were our current possessions helping us live the life we wanted? What changes could we make to our life that would get us closer to the life we wanted?

Don’t Be Afraid To Experiment

After asking ourselves all those questions we realized that we wanted to simplify our life and make room for our dreams. Simplifying can be daunting, especially if the changes are going to be permanent. How would we know if we were making a mistake? But here’s the thing - we didn’t have to make permanent changes right away. We could practice, pretend, and experiment.

We parked our Prius in the garage for one month, choosing to only drive our minivan to see if we could make it work. We boxed up clothes, toys, and other household items, storing them in the basement, pretending we didn’t have them. We experimented with floor sleeping. We closed off parts of our house, pretending we had less square footage and a single bathroom. Chris asked to work from home on Fridays, getting a feel for remote work.

Take Action

Our experiments gave us the confidence to take action in changing our life. We realized we could live with one vehicle. We sold the Prius and with the money we received we were able to pay off our minivan loan and make a nice principal payment on our mortgage. Most of the items stored in the basement were donated and sold. The money we made was helpful, but more importantly, we realized we didn’t need to buy more stuff, saving us money in the long run and making room in our budget for travel. Pretending to live in half our house turned into selling our home, moving into an apartment, and building our Little White Shack - coming summer 2019. The money we made from selling our home allowed Chris to take a one year mini-retirement and find a remote job he loves.

If you are feeling stuck in life right now, start questioning the constraints you are living within. Then start experimenting with how you can make changes. And after you’ve followed through on those experiments and found answers to your questions, take action to make a significant impact on your future!

What would you accomplish if you questioned the status quo and experimented with a new way of life?

Now that you know how to get unstuck, it’s time to focus on living with intention. But what does this mean? If you’ve figured out what you value and have made actionable steps to start living by those values, you’re ready to start living with intention (well, you’ve already started). There are three things to know that will help you keep the course. It’s not always easy, but it is always worth it!

Exercise Willpower

Living with intention usually means going against the flow of society. The world wants us to spend our money frivolously. These purchases make us feel good in the moment, but usually don’t help us live by our values. This is where willpower comes in.

I used to go to Target for diapers, formula, and toilet paper. Every trip I would also stop by the $1 section, walk the home decor aisles, and browse clothing all while sipping my Starbucks. This usually resulted in my shopping bill being $100-$200 dollars over my original intentions.

I would come home excited, but a few days later I would look at my credit card bill and be baffled by the total. How did I spend that much? I honestly couldn’t recall all my purchases. That shows how important and useful they were, right?

When I realized that shopping at Target wasn’t good for our budget I stopped going. I bought toothpaste, toilet paper, and cleaning products from the grocery store. This helped significantly. There did come a day when I finally stepped back into Target. It was difficult to walk past all those bright colors without grabbing something. I had to remind myself I didn’t need that item and place it back on the shelf.

When I returned home without those extra purchases, I was really proud of myself. But that doesn’t mean it was easy. With continued practice, my shopping cravings lessened - mostly because I was seeing results. My credit card bill no longer depleted my bank account. I even had money left over to save for vacations. This continues to give me the willpower to continue. I haven’t been perfect, but I’m still making progress on our freedom dreams.

Don’t Be Afraid To Spend On Your Values

Things will pop up in life that you don’t expect. Decisions will need to be made. But how do you make the best decision in relation to living an intentional life? Consider your values and available resources.

When my plans for a weekend trip to Arizona got canceled, a decision had to be made. My ticket was non-refundable. I could forgo the trip and take a $500 loss, or we could spend more money to get Chris a plane ticket and turn it into a short getaway. Had this happened a few years ago, Chris would have said to take the loss. He wouldn’t have been able to come to terms with spending money on something unnecessary.

But now that we know our values, Chris recognized the quality time that this trip would provide. We also had the funds to make this happen. We had decided a few months prior that we would set aside a nice amount of money each paycheck for vacations. Choosing to spend more money, especially on short notice, was the right decision for us. It fell within our value system, making it an easy yes.

(Follow up on that story: After dropping our girls off at my parents for the long weekend, our departure flight ended up being canceled due to the weather. We decided to take the refund instead of rescheduling due to our limited time in Arizona and spent a kid free weekend relaxing, watching movies, eating out, and taking a trip to IKEA. It ended up being a fantastic weekend.)

Learn and Move Forward

When you take action in changing your life (maybe it’s unplugging the TV, choosing to eat out once a week, or taking a vacation), keep moving forward. Keep progressing, learning, evolving, and doing.

After our first family road trip we were eager to continue. The following year we had a successful trip to Florida - maybe even better than our first! Then we planned our third road trip.

We were full of confidence, pushing ourselves to the next level, excited to explore out West. We covered over 4,000 miles in twelve days, spending over 60 hours in the minivan. We had several four hour stints of driving that resulted in screaming fits. We had a child with her first loose tooth who refused to eat anything but milkshakes. And over half of our hotel stops made me cringe. By the time we reached our last motel of the trip I made Chris make a U-turn in the parking lot and keep driving until we found a Holiday Inn Express. The closest one was three hours away! The next morning the girls and I were like stubborn donkeys that refused to move - we did not want to get back in that minivan!

That experience could have been the end of our road trips, but we valued the quality time and experiences this trip had provided. We hiked at Glacier National Park, Mt. Rainer, Yellowstone National Park, and Mt. Rushmore! We never would have had those experiences if it weren’t for that road trip, so no regrets. But we did learn lessons.

We crammed in too many miles for a twelve day trip. Our next trip needed to be slower - fewer miles driven each day and time to relax at our hotels. When we planned our next summer road trip out East we kept this at the forefront of our minds. It turned out to be one of the best trips we’ve ever taken. We loved hiking in New Hampshire, walking around Central Park, and swimming in the ocean in Delaware.

We didn’t give up on something we valued because it became stressful or challenging. The answer wasn’t to stop doing what we loved, but to make some adjustments so that we could live according to our values even better. Because of this, we were able to move forward in our journey with more knowledge and better results.

Are you living with intention? What has helped you in your journey?

Do you think your dreams are unattainable? In addition to 3 Steps To Get Financially Unstuck and 3 Ways To Live With Intention, we have come to realize a few other components that have made a huge difference in turning our dreams into a reality.

Change Your Mindset

For most of my life I told myself I couldn’t. Everything seemed out of reach or too complicated. Because of this, I didn’t even try to make my dreams a reality. One thing I really wanted to do was paint all the woodwork in our first home white, but I wasn’t the best painter and there was a lot of woodwork. I didn’t even know the right way to go about it anyway.

In 2015 my confidence was at an all time low and my depression at an all time high. I needed to do something for me, to lift me up. I still wanted to paint the woodwork and finally decided to give it a try. I bought primer, paint, tape, and a paintbrush. I turned on the radio and got to work. I had no idea what I was doing, but I was doing it anyway. I figured I would learn along the way.

After two layers of primer and paint I pulled the tape away and found an uneven paint job. Instead of feeling defeated, I grabbed the wall paint to fix the mistakes. Then I noticed that the gaps between the wall and woodwork made it difficult to create an even look. I was determined to figure out how to get the look I wanted. I continued to tweak my approach. Eventually my process looked like this:

1. Fill gaps between trim and wall with 3M Patch Plus Primer, using baby wipes to smooth the spackle before it dried
2. Two coats of primer and paint on trim and spackle
3. Tape woodwork, paint wall color just above the tape
4. Finally, fix small mistakes with very thin paint brush

It took multiple tries and revisions to get to this point, but in the end I had really crisp lines! In the process I realized I had also changed my mindset from I can’t, to I can try, to I will figure it out!

Allow Yourself To Have A Beginning

Back when I told myself that I couldn’t, I spent a lot of time feeling that I wasn’t talented or financially successful. When I wanted to remodel our first home, I watched Fixer Upper in awe of their talent, knowing I didn’t have any of those skills. When a friend moved to Australia, we wished to visit, but felt we would never be able to save enough money to make it happen (cost $3,000). I truly believed that I was destined to float through life with dreams unfulfilled.

Then I read Capital Gaines and learned that their story didn’t start with a remodeled farmhouse and a TV show. Chip started with fixing up small homes he rented to college students. Joanna started by decorating their first home in various themes. With each small project they took on their knowledge and talent grew. Their first projects were imperfect. They faced roadblocks and struggles on their journey. What we see on TV is the culmination of all those experiences. They had a beginning.

When we wanted to travel to Australia, we had a hard time saving money. We made good money and spent freely in our day to day life. It never dawned on me to change how we spent our income. When we finally took our first family road trip (cost: $3,000) five years later, we didn’t magically have the funds to travel. In fact, our expenses with three kids had increased more than our income had. Instead, we started tracking our spending and tried to decrease our expenses one category at a time. We decreased our grocery bill, followed by spending less on clothes, and then eliminated our auto loan by selling our second vehicle. Accomplishing our dream of being able to save up for travel started with making small changes that led to many road trips, traveling to Hawaii and Costa Rica, and still on the wish list - Australia!

If you have a dream, don’t expect to be able to do it right away. Allow yourself to take small steps that build upon each other. Remember that everything has a beginning. You have to start somewhere to get to the next place.

Create Your Support System

My belief that we couldn’t accomplish our goals came from negative self talk and letting people convince me that we wouldn’t succeed. Creating a strong support system helped stop the negative self talk and build the confidence we needed to move forward.

I needed people in my day to day life that lifted me up. When my husband supported me in remodeling our home, his belief in my skills helped me to persevere. When I found a therapist that understood me, she helped me create the tools I needed to build my confidence and follow our dreams. And when I found friends who love me in the midst of my unconventional dreams, I found strength in following my values.

We’ve also found that reaching out to people who have more knowledge on the things we want to accomplish has helped us move forward. When we researched moving to Costa Rica for 9 months, we connected with a principal of an international school in Uvita who was willing to help us navigate challenges and answer any questions we had. When I decided to design our new home, The Little White Shack, I found a builder who was willing and had the experience to help me bring my vision to life. And when Chris wanted to take this blog to the next level, he reached out to the the personal finance community for support and advice. So many people freely lifted Chris up, including but not limited to: Grant, Jillian, Nick, The Groovys, J. Money, Fritz, Cait, Mystery Money Man, Jim, Jay, and Scott. Creating these support systems took stepping outside our comfort zone, but it was worth it.

We are so grateful to everyone who has supported and believed in us and we want to pay that kindness forward. Chris and I would be happy to be a part of your support system - just reach out!

So much has and is changing in our finances this year. Chris is back to having a regular paycheck. We will move out of our apartment this Summer, move into our new house, and be back to having a mortgage. While we aren’t excited about the mortgage, we are thankful to be able to build our dream home, the Little White Shack.

We definitely want to pay off our mortgage as soon as possible. I know we will be tempted to take every extra cent and throw it at eliminating this debt. For some people that is the right decision, but I want to make sure that we don’t neglect our other values, mental sanity, or relationships in the pursuit of debt freedom.

For us, this means contributing to charities we believe in, investing in travel, and spending money hosting dinner with friends. Sure we could postpone these things and pay off our mortgage crazy fast, but it would leave us feeling empty. That’s not what we want.

With those things in mind, we are creating a general spending plan for the year. To help wrap my mind around all the different types of spending that come up throughout the year, I divided each category into one of two groups: needs or wants. And since we have been tracking our spending in Thrifty for over 3 years, it was fairly easy to come up with spending estimates. Here is our plan:

This brings our total spending plan to $170,860. This definitely isn’t a normal year for us, mostly because we are building our house. The $90,000 for the Little White Shack has already been saved up, so that won’t affect our bi-weekly paycheck. Along with that, some of our healthcare costs are covered via Chris’s employer ($3,240 healthcare premium) and an HSA account ($2,890 balance remaining as of January 2019). When you take these expenses out of our total, our spending plan is $74,730!

Halfway through the year, we’ll let you know how we are doing! We’ll tell you if we estimated any category wrong, over-spent, under-spent, and where we land on our mortgage!

If you read enough personal finance articles, you’re bound to have come across numerous discussions about needs versus wants.

If you take the messages at face value, you’ll come away with a sense that the majority of your financial issues come from an inability to minimize your wants.

This sage advice comes from all over, whether it be from your favorite personal finance blogger or musicians from the 1990’s.

It’s not having what you want
It’s wanting what you’ve got
Sheryl Crow

At the end of the day, most financial “wisdom” these days seems to tell you that wants are bad and you should get rid of those urges altogether.

Live like a caveman and you can retire in 3 years!

While I appreciate the sentiment, I think people often take this too far.

Money is a tool. A tool that is meant to be exchanged for things that are of value.

So, why are wants bad? If your wants are things that align with your values, aren’t they completely worth spending on?

Frivolous Wants

The problem is that unfortunately, for most people, the wants they spend are not in alignment with their values.

It’s the cute, but frivolous, serving tray from the Target Home Decor aisle that they didn’t even know existed until they entered the store.

It’s the awesome new thing on Kickstarter that is such a cool idea (and look awesome!) but solves a problem they don’t really have.

It’s habitual spending on in-app purchases, whether it’s a new outfit for a digital pet or a new gun to kill those pesky zombies.

These purchases are wants in the moment, but aren’t usually an accurate reflection or real values.

How do I know? Because Jaime and I have been there.

We have always wanted to travel. But despite making a decent income, we never seemed to find the money.

Disappointed that we couldn’t afford to travel, we’d blow our money on ice cream treats, carry-out dinners, revolving household decor, and kitchen gadgets.

And, because we blew our money on these, we never had the money to travel.

It was a vicious cycle.

But once we started tracking our spending, everything changed.

We started to see how much we spent on ice cream. How much we spent on carry-out. How much on decor, and how much on gadgets.

And when we saw the totals, it was staggering.

Values-Based Wants

Seeing the big picture of our spending helped us understand the crazy amount of money we were spending on frivolous purchases. When we saw those numbers rolled up, we knew we could shrink our frivolous spending without feeling any real pain.

Cooking six nights a week instead of four would save us hundreds in our food bill.

Cutting Target and Costco out of our shopping altogether would eliminate even more in impulse buys.

And with these thousands of dollars, we could afford to travel. We could afford to increase our charitable giving. We could prepay our mortgage and save for retirement.

Once we were able to look at our spending at a high level, we quickly saw that we had more than enough to spend on our wants - at least the wants that really added value to our lives.

It wasn’t about foregoing wants, it was about prioritizing wants based on our values. (Tweet this )

Over the last three years, we’ve refined this practice year-over-year:

• In 2016, we spent $104,000 total
• In 2017, we spent $92,000 total
• In 2018, we spent $83,000 total
• In 2019, we’ve budgeted $80,000 (not including our house down payment and initial furnishing)

And all the while, we’ve steadily increased our spending on value-adding wants:

• In 2016, we spent $4,400 on travel and $6,700 in charity
• In 2017, we spent $5,300 on travel and $2,750 in charity
• In 2018, we spent $19,000 on travel and $4,000 in charity
• In 2019, we’ve budgeted $12,000 for travel and $12,000 for charity

This is the spending that gives us joy. The spending that we feel aligns with our values, and I wouldn’t eliminate this at all. These aren’t bad wants - these are the wants that are most important.

What’s Next

Jaime’s going through the exercise of recategorizing all of our entries in Thrifty into value-based wants, “fun” (aka frivolous wants), and needs.

Once we get through that, We’re going to take a look at how our proportion between these has changed over time and we’ll share the results year.

Without seeing the numbers in front of me, I can tell you that we feel so much better about how we budget and spend today.

Having money carved out for our priorities make me completely comfortable saying “yes” to a last-minute family trip to Nevada. It makes us happy to increase our giving to great causes like The Hope Effect and World Vision.

This process has changed our lives. And I bet it can change yours too.

So, I challenge you.

Track your spending for three months. Measure how much you’re actually spending on those frivolous wants and see what real wants you could afford if you cut the frivolous ones in half.

Back in 2017, we took on the challenge to buy nothing new for a full calendar year. We wanted to break away from the consumerism that surrounds us on a daily basis. Our hope was that if we could get through an entire year of buying nothing new that it would help us become more intentional with our money.

We came up with five strategies to help us avoid buying new items:

1. Wear out - don’t replace items until they no longer perform their function
2. Fix - where possible, fix broken/torn items instead of replacing
3. Repurpose - do we already have something that can fulfill that item’s usage?
4. Self-provision - can we make it ourselves from other materials?
5. Buy used - can we find what we need used instead of new

While those strategies were useful, we knew that there were going to be exceptions. Chris and I thought hard and came up with 4 exceptions that we felt were in line with our values:

• Underwear, Socks, and Shoes
• Photo prints (school pictures and for our road trip map)
• Car maintenance parts (we know we need new tires next year)
• Home remodeling (we needed to wrap up current projects)

Our Experience

Chris and I were really optimistic when we started January 1, 2017. We even stayed within the rules! We did buy new carbon monoxide detectors, which weren’t on the exception list. But it was a safety issue for our family and deemed a necessary new purchase. The following two months we stayed focused and never broke our challenge rules. We went into month four thinking this challenge was going to be easy for our minimalist family.

Then my computer’s power cord finally gave out. We debated buying used, but we had already done that and it had not lasted long. So we broke the challenge for a good cause, buying a brand spanking new mac laptop power cord! It was a justified purchase. But that’s the problem right? Once you make one excuse, a few more follow. I bought one of our kids a costume as a birthday present. I told myself it was an experience, but let’s be honest - it was an item! And either way it was new.

The following month I bought some stainless steel straws. I still love them to this day, but it honestly was an impulse purchase. A week later I found myself having a pity party. My clothes all felt worn and frumpy. I felt worn and frumpy. I had errands to run and decided I would just have a look in one of my favorite shops. I walked out with an $80 summer dress from Title Nine. I felt a little guilty, but I came up with an excuse to justify my expensive buy. This is what I said to Chris when I showed him the dress:

“Our buy nothing new challenge is supposed to help us be more intentional with our spending. I want you to know that I very intentionally bought this dress!” (Tweet this )

I was really proud of myself for that statement! It was also the downfall of our experiment. The second half of the year was full of new purchases. We had multiple issues with buying second hand clothes for the girls. One was that we would later find holes in unfortunate places - so we gave up on buying used pants. I struggled with Sciatica and purchased a stability ball and foam roller to help. They were more or less impulse purchases that I used to delay going to a doctor. I now visit a chiropractor and don’t use those items.

Buying stuff in the second half of the year felt like binging on food after a miserable diet. In the following months we bought a lot of new items. We continued to try avoiding buying new, but our resolve wasn’t as strong. Buying used takes more time and patience (sifting through thrift stores). We were tired and buying new felt easier at times.

Trying to buy nothing new for a full year was tough. We finished the year with 90 new purchased items. This is far above our goal of zero, but the challenge did have an impact on how much new stuff we bought. In 2016 we had purchased 153 new items. We cut that by 40% in 2017. We also learned a few lessons along the way.

5 Lessons From Our Buy Nothing New Challenge

1. There will be unexpected necessary purchases (carbon monoxide detectors)
2. You will have a pity party at some point (my $80 dress, that I still love by the way)
3. Be diligent when you purchase used (holes in pants we didn’t notice before)
4. Don’t use purchases as solutions (stability ball)
5. When taking on a new challenge, start small (a full year is a long time, a three month challenge would have been a better first step)

Have you ever taken a buy nothing new challenge? How did it go for you?

I’ve been dreaming up different house plans for years. The square feet, number of bedrooms, and layout always varied, but the one thing that remained the same was my desire to create a functional compact home. For us, smaller square feet means a smaller mortgage and less to clean! This frees up financial resources to invest in other things we love to do (travel). It also frees up our time - I would rather spend my Saturday hiking than cleaning bathrooms!

Now that we have taken the step to build, all those different designs have melded together to become the floor plan below. While my focus has been on creating a small, multi-functional home, there are two areas that I loosened that focus in order to emphasize our values.

1. The first area we wanted to focus on was our screened-in deck. While we could have kept it small or even delayed building this feature to save money, we dreamed of having a mosquito free outdoor sanctuary where we could relax and spend time with friends and family. So instead of limiting this space, we extended the deck to be 20x10 sq ft.

2. The other area we extended was the kids’ bedroom. While we know the girls can survive in a 10x10 bedroom space together, I know that their need for privacy is growing. With that in mind, I created a 400 sq. ft. oasis with individual retreats (built in queen beds with shelf, outlet, light, and curtain) and an ensuite bathroom that maximizes privacy with three separate zones (toilet, sinks, shower).

   Note: You may wonder why we opt for a single bedroom instead of individual rooms for our girls: This has been an intentional choice. For Chris and I, the girls sharing a bedroom builds their friendship while also putting them in a situation where they have to learn to respect each other and resolve conflicts. Plus, the giggles we often hear after 7pm melt my heart - I wouldn’t want it any other way!

The remaining areas of the little white shack were designed to provide the biggest bang per square foot. For us, this meant creating multi-functional spaces that work for our family and lifestyle. This is how we made our decisions for each space:

1. Our minimalist lifestyle shows itself in our kitchen - a small galley that leads to the screened-in deck! There’s little counter space, limited storage, no microwave, and no cooktop range. Chris and I prefer simple meals, stay away from single purpose gadgets, and focus on using up groceries instead of stocking up. We have just enough counter space and storage to match our needs, haven’t used a microwave in years, and are opting to use induction hot plates that can be stored when not in use. It is a kitchen that exactly meets our needs!

2. We love our long narrow IKEA table and designed our dining space to fit it perfectly. This is where most of our life happens - family dinners, gathering with friends for pizza night, building puzzles, kids art projects, work, homework, and so much more. This table is at the center of our home, overlapping with the kitchen and open to the living room. It is the heart of our home, pulling us all together no matter what we are doing!

3. Chris and I have always wanted a fireplace in our living room. Sure, it’s not necessary and would save us close to $5k if we eliminated this feature, but it provides an extra layer of coziness in the winter. And this is exactly what we want out of our living room - a cozy welcoming space that invites you to sink in and relax. We don’t need a large room to make this happen. Instead we’ll be focusing more on the decor to maximize seating and create an atmosphere that encourages family movie nights, snuggling up with a good book, and chatting with friends.

4. We designed our bedroom to be useful day and night by installing a Murphy bed with a desk so Chris also has an office. We wanted to keep our room compact, yet comfortable. So when the bed is down, there is just enough space to comfortably walk around the bed and instead of nightstands, we each have our own 9 ft high cupboard that houses our minimalist wardrobe.

   Note: We love floor sleeping so much and don’t want to give it up with the Murphy bed. So the company making our bed is customizing our unit to accommodate our Japanese floor mat!

5. I wanted a single bathroom on the main floor that functioned as an ensuite and main floor restroom. In order to do this, I added a door off the kitchen that opens to a small landing space. That landing space has a door to the bathroom and a separate door to our bedroom. This allows Chris to work privately in our room during the day while also allowing anyone to access the bathroom. At night, we can close the kitchen door to create an ensuite feel.

6. In order to keep our home small, I needed to keep the mudroom simple. With five people in our family a large mudroom seems ideal, but I decided on a small hallway with hooks that just accommodate the current season. Off season shoes, jackets, etc will be stored in our unfinished basement where our laundry will also be located. In the end, it wasn’t worth the extra cost to us to make space for laundry and storage on the main floor.

7. We love being a single car family and plan on sticking with this lifestyle choice. We don’t want a two car garage, but we do want extra space for bike storage and maneuverability around our van. With this vision, I designed a deep garage with a little extra width - 16x28 square feet.

We feel so blessed to be able to build a home that matches our minimalist lifestyle. Most places wouldn’t allow a 1,112 square foot home with a single car garage due to neighborhood ordinances and deed restrictions. So when a narrow lot with zero restrictions in the middle of our town came up for sale we knew it was a match made in heaven. We can’t wait to enjoy life in the Little White Shack - a childhood dream come true!

Here’s the Little White Shack Floor Plan:

Hello, my friend :)

It’s been just over four months, since I sent my last newsletter. A lot has changed in that time, and there are also a lot of new people who are hearing from me for the first time. So I’m here to say: hello to all! A very belated “happy new year”. And before starting the next season of the newsletter, I thought it would be nice to share some of what I’ve been doing, consuming + thinking about so far this year. Future newsletters may not make sense, without this info.

What I’ve Been Doing

Overall, the first few months of 2019 have generally been pretty quiet. I created a nice routine: writing first thing in the morning, going to the gym/hiking in the afternoon, visiting with friends (and spending many hours/days holding the new identical twin girls born to one of my oldest friends!) and having a night at home. As much as I like to challenge myself, I’ve also accepted that routine really does help me get things done—as well as supports my mental health.

What has made this a little more interesting is that I’ve done all of this in my hometown, Victoria, BC. Last summer, I began to wonder what it would be like to give up my apartment and travel full-time for a year. I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but it also seemed like a natural extension of how I’ve already been living. And so, after sitting on that question for some time, I ultimately decided to give it a go. I gave up my apartment in Squamish and left there at the end of 2018.

My idea, for this year anyway, is that I’ll spend a few months at my dad’s house in Victoria, and then spend the rest of the year travelling. I want to move fairly slowly, staying in places for at least one month at a time—and that’s both so I can maintain my routine and enjoy the new places I’m in. It’s not something everyone would enjoy, and I certainly won’t sell it as a dream, but it’s feeling quite natural, so far.

So, that’s a fairly big update on my personal life, I suppose! Aside from that, I’ve actually been working a lot. The paperback version of The Year of Less came out in January, and I did two events to support that: one at Powell’s in Portland, the other for a great group of people in Nashville. But most of the work I’ve been doing this year was on my proposal for book #2. And I’m so happy to share that it was acquired by Little, Brown Spark a few weeks ago!

I’ll be able to tell you a lot more about that, as time goes on. For now, I’m excited to share the title: ADVENTURES IN OPTING OUT. It should be ready for you in fall 2020. :)

What I’ve Been Consuming

Whew! Ok, that was a pretty massive update, haha. But oddly, I’m more excited to share what I’ve been consuming + thinking about so far this year. Because that’s the nitty gritty stuff, right? Some of the details that make up our days!

At the start of 2019, I still felt completely tapped out of nearly everything happening online—and in a lot of ways, that hasn’t changed. The general feeling I get when I look at most blogs/social media profiles is that everyone is an expert and they are all prescribing expertise I’ll never have or yet another long list of things I will never achieve, all of which, ultimately, just makes me feel worse about myself. And I can’t read it anymore.

I’ve been craving stories. Journeys to follow. Even just the “boring” (NOT BORING) updates we used to share on blogs. Like what are you thinking about right now? What have you been curious enough to actually learn more about? And where are the BEGINNERS!? Where are the people who are raising their hands and saying “I have no idea what I’m doing, but here’s what I’m attempting and my progress so far”? I miss those days. Blogging was actually fun, back then.

Books

In the absence of reading whatever is on the internet these days, I’ve picked up more books this year. Way more than usual. To date, I’ve read 14 (about 4 per month)! And aside from Company of One and Digital Minimalism (both of which I love), they have been memoirs and works of fiction. Stories. Real-life thoughts and lessons. Characters you are rooting for (or some you’re not). And my gosh, it has felt both indulgent, and like a really positive shift.

A few of my faves so far have been:

• Becoming by Michelle Obama (listened to the audiobook, which she narrated)
• Come Back Frayed by Colin Wright (the first line basically described me to a tee)
• Let My People Go Surfing by Yvon Chouinard (a mix of personal stories and lessons)
• No Happy Endings by Nora McInerny (I appreciate her and love the message of this story)
• ***The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Ann Shaffer + Annie Barrows

***THIS BOOK! UGH, so good! I read it after watching the movie (for the second time) and believe it is one I will read again and again. It’s written entirely in letters being sent between people, and has inspired an idea for this newsletter.

Podcasts

You might remember that last year I basically unsubscribed from everything, including most newsletters and podcasts. I also stopped using Twitter. Part of this was to help with the general sense of overwhelm re: how much content exists (reminder: you can’t read, watch and do everything). But I was also curious how my thoughts about them all might change. And change, they have! There were a few newsletters I missed (and a few more I unsubscribed from). And I kept experimenting with Twitter, but don’t think I’ll ever go back there. It’s simply too hostile.

The change with podcasts was a little bigger. First, I not only unsubscribed from them all but also deleted every episode I had downloaded. A little digital declutter, I suppose. Then, whenever I missed a show, I would download the latest episode that sounded interesting. Sometimes I enjoyed them, but I haven’t subscribed to any of them. Instead, I’ve taken recommendations from friends to listen to a specific episode of a podcast, and have found so many new voices and topics that way. I’ve also found a few people I enjoy and listened to many interviews they’ve done, so I can learn more.

This isn’t particularly helpful, I’m sure, but I’m sharing because it’s been yet another act of letting go. Releasing the expectation that you have to follow something entirely from beginning to end, and being ok with the fact that some things only come into your life for a reason or a season.

Anyway, here are the few podcasts I’ve listened to more than one episode of:

• Climate One – candid conversations about energy, the economy and the environment. I started by devouring the episodes with Yvon Chouinard (who I’m fascinated with right now).
• Front Burner – my new fave podcast by the CBC. Every weekday, Jayme Poisson takes one of the big stories in Canada and helps you understand what’s going on, what the impact is, etc.
• Making Sense – Sam Harris changed the name of his podcast, which threw me off. I’ve listened to the eps with Jack Dorsey (Twitter) and Roger McNamee (Facebook). Also have the one on digital capitalism downloaded.
• Real Talk Radio – Nicole has done TWENTY (20) seasons of this show now and I still love it! Have a few episodes from the new season downloaded for upcoming travel days. :)
• The Slow Home Podcast – Brooke and Ben decided to change the format of the podcast and start doing it in seasons, which I am always in favour of (change is healthy). It was also lovely to hear about their journey home.

What I’ve Been Thinking About

The better question might be: what haven’t I been thinking about this year? As you can imagine, with giving up my home, selling another book, travelling full-time, there’s a lot on my mind. For the sake of keeping things simple, I’ll share two topics and some of the thoughts I’ve had around them both. I will preface this by saying there are no answers here. Just thoughts, questions, etc. :)

1. A few months ago, I listened to this podcast called The Dream. It’s about the history of MLMs (multi-level marketing companies) and I devoured all 11 episodes within a week. There were so many interesting points shared throughout it (including people’s experiences with them) but there was one that really stood out for me: the fact that, yes, there are some people who make a lot of money with MLMs. But they are the 1%. The majority of the money they earn comes from the people they have recruited. And while MLMs haven’t disappeared, more and more people now see them for what they are and avoid them at all costs. While I was listening, the only thing I could think about was: wow, this sounds a lot like selling the dream of being a full-time blogger. Yes, some people make a lot of money doing it. But they are the 1%. The majority of the money they earn comes from people clicking on affiliate links, buying products, etc. And people can package up their tips, tricks and expertise, but they can’t sell their unique experiences, character traits, or skills that help them do what they do. A few questions I’ve pondered since: I wonder how long the “make money online” industry will continue to seem appealing? If this hasn’t happened already, I wonder when people will begin to avoid blogs that talk about ways to make money, the same way we avoid friends who join MLMs and try to sell us products we don’t need? And I wonder if/when the whole thing will crumble? Maybe never! Actually, probably never! But anyway, that one podcast series opened my eyes in a way I wasn’t expecting when I first started listening.
2. How can I do more to help the planet? It’s the one question I’ve thought about more than anything else, this year. And it’s scary to start writing and sharing any of the thoughts that have come up for me, because I only know enough to know I don’t know much of anything yet lol. I am not an expert on the environment or climate change or consumption or waste or anything else. I’m also not interested in becoming an expert or trying to be “perfect”. But I’m standing in the place most of my other personal journeys have begun: where I’m starting to notice things and pay more attention, ask questions and figure out what feels right for me, before taking too many steps down a new and unknown path. One thing I have done is committed to donating 1% of my income to environmental causes via 1% For The Planet. I’ve also been looking for more podcasts on these topics, so I can find new people to learn from, books to read, etc. If you have any suggestions, I’m all ears! Please! Anything you want to share. :)

Ok, I’ll leave it there for today, my friend! I’ll be starting up my newsletter again, and have a fun idea for it that I’m excited to share with you. But now I’d love to hear from you. How has 2019 been so far? What’s on your mind? Is there anything you want to learn more about this year?

xx Cait

This was originally shared in my newsletter.

Hello, my friend :)

I’m writing from the kitchen table at a friend’s flat in London. It’s 9am, around 11°C (52°F) and looks like we’re in for yet another classic British forecast: some sun, some cloud, some rain, and a little wind to mix it all up and sprinkle it throughout the day. Note that I’m not complaining! This weather is similar to what I would be experiencing at home. I’m only talking about it because that’s what you do in the UK. ;)

I’ve been in England for a month now, and it’s taken that long for me to feel like I can settle in and get some actual work done now. That’s not good or bad. It’s just something I’m going to have to think more about, as I continue to map out my travels. Because I’ve been here before, I assumed I would be able to quickly settle into a routine of writing, going for long walks, cooking, seeing some friends, etc. Of course, it’s never as simple as we want it to be, is it?

Within 5 days of being here, I reconnected with someone I met last year and our first conversation quickly opened my eyes and shifted one of my priorities. At the same time, it only took one trip to the grocery store for me to be faced with a new truth: that my thoughts and values around the consumption of single-use plastics have changed dramatically over the past year, and I feel really (read: really) uncomfortable shopping here now, where nearly everything is wrapped in it.

Before I left Victoria, I had coffee with an old friend I hadn’t seen in a few years. When we said goodbye, he hugged me and whispered, “you know you’re going to come back changed, right?” It hit me hard, and felt like the most honest thing someone had ever said to me. I said yes and, one month later, I can confirm that he was right. But it’s also true that I changed even before I left. I just didn’t know it, until I returned to somewhere I’d been before and saw it with new eyes.

Anyway, I still haven’t dug deep enough into those thoughts or feelings yet, to make more sense of them or figure out what’s next for me. What I have done is kept a detailed journal of everything I’ve done so far on this trip, along with little notes so I can remember what I was thinking while I was here. In flipping through the pages, I realized that some of my notes might actually be helpful for others. So I’ve compiled a list of 30 thoughts to share from my first 30 days away.

I hope at least one of them feels good for you. :)

1. Sometimes meeting someone one time is good enough, and you should leave the memory at that.
2. Sometimes meeting someone a second and third time proves to be better, and you realize you might have even more in common than you thought the first time.
3. You won’t know who the “one time only” people are, until you see them a second or third time.
4. You can change a lot in a year.
5. Your values can change a lot in a year too.
6. The people you can sit in silence with, or quietly read your own books together with, are special. It’s strange how being silent with someone can actually be more memorable than forcing your way through a conversation.
7. When you’re unexpectedly in the same place as someone at the same time, make plans. The universe wants you to spend time together.
8. It’s not always a good idea to meet your heroes. But sometimes, you meet them and are pleasantly surprised to discover they are exactly who you hoped they would be.
9. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. (I already knew this lesson, but have been reminded of it a few times.)
10. There are people who understand you and people who never will. Don’t try to force the latter. It’s ok if only a few people really understand you. It’s a gift to have even one.
11. You don’t owe anyone an interaction. Hard stop.
12. Being a beginner sucks most of the time, until you’re no longer a beginner. When you start to see the early signs of your efforts paying off, you’ll be glad you tried something new.
13. Being self-aware is exhausting. But it can also be a gift for you and everyone who comes into your life.
14. You don’t have to always be right. One day, you will overhear a stranger from another country try to explain something silly/inconsequential about yours. And they will get it all wrong, but tell the story with such enthusiasm that you can’t bear to tell them the truth. So, don’t! Let them think they are right. Who is it really hurting?
15. It can feel really good to do regular daily life things in new cities.
16. Move at the pace that feels natural to you.
17. “Treat everyone you meet like an old friend.” (I first read this quote in a book last year, and have thought about it almost every day since—especially when it comes to dating.)
18. Rejection isn’t about you. Even if it seems like it is, it’s really not.
19. A breakup won’t be the worst thing you go through. You’ve survived worse.
20. The kindest thing you can do is let someone go on their own journey, even if it doesn’t include you.
21. Don’t be afraid to tell people what positive impact they’ve had on you. We don’t do this enough, probably because it’s scary. But put yourself in their shoes. Wouldn’t it be nice to hear how you had helped someone?
22. The thought of trying to do anything to help the planet is so overwhelming, because you quickly realize that basically everything you do is bad for the planet. Turn the dial back and remember what ONE thing sparked these spiralling thoughts. Start with that.
23. All you can do is live according to your values.
24. When someone invites you to go on an adventure, don’t ask too many questions. Say yes, pack water/snacks and go.
25. The state of your space is the state of your mind.
26. Decluttering is just a tool. You need to dig up the root(s) cause, so it doesn’t keep spreading and you aren’t clearing out the mess again every 5-10 years.
27. There’s no point in earning more money or being successful if you aren’t sharing it with people/the world.
28. Nothing matters more than the health of you and your loved ones.
29. When it comes to big/tough decisions, take your ego out of the equation and then ask yourself what you should do.
30. When in doubt, rent the pedal boat. You will laugh. A LOT.

xx Cait

PS – I wrote the intro to this newsletter in my journal, and am thinking about writing them all like that while I’m away and, of course, sharing them with you! It feels like I’m writing a letter to a friend (and who doesn’t love snail mail?). The tone will naturally be much more conversational, but I’m curious if my writing will get any better as time goes on and I can’t constantly self-edit? I won’t know, unless I try! Here’s to new experiments and being a beginner again. :)

This was originally shared in my newsletter.

At Podia, we ended 2018 at 10 people. By the end of April 2019, we were 17. Very quickly, as we were hiring more people, it became very apparent that we would need to update our processes.

In principle, I hate processes. I think most of the time they just get in the way of doing real work and add unnecessary steps from whatever you’re trying to do. Having to double-check that you’re following company procedure or logging into yet another application to perform a task is frustrating and brain draining to me.

But, the reality is, knowledge sharing and the general understanding of how things work at your company tend to break down as you grow.

As our company grew, we found this to be true for us, so we added a few new processes to help:

1. Hiring process

Before 2019, we were only hiring one person at a time, so managing the process was fairly straightforward. We had a job posting on our website, a link to a Typeform to submit the application, and we used Dropbox Paper to track candidates and share feedback between the people in charge of hiring.

In 2019, we started hiring for 3 positions at once (Creative Support Agent, Developer, and Creative Content Marketer) and trying to manage all of that with how we had things set up broke down, and quickly. The bottle neck was reviewing applications and taking feedback, so we moved to a “proper” Application Tracking System to smooth out our process.

2. File sharing and document sharing

As more people joined the team, it became unwieldy without proper permission settings, so we finally bit the bullet and upgraded our Dropbox setup from shared Personal folders to Dropbox Teams. The benefit is two-fold: it helps us now and protects us down the road when people eventually leave the team (though we’ve been very lucky to date 🤞).

Before, we’d just share a document with the relevant people as needed, but people having to request access to documents was a pain. This way, everything is super well-organized in our Dropbox account and we have it segmented by department.

One thing I kind of lament is the fact that Dropbox Teams is pretty expensive at $20/user/month. That adds up with 17 people where we’re now paying $340/month. 🤷‍♂️

3. 1-on-1s

We’ve never had a very formal process to our 1-on-1s. As a small team under 10, we were able to keep fairly up-to-date and engaged with people through Slack and our weekly calls. I’d do 1-on-1s every few months as things became quieter.

Now, as we’ve grown, we’re looking into 1-on-1 apps as a way to formalize the process and I also think we need to increase the frequency of 1-on-1s. At this time, I’m not in favor of weekly or even bi-weekly 1-on-1s, so we’ll likely consider monthly or every six weeks to test that out.

4. Company knowledge board

While we had just started using a company knowledge board to gather and document all of our internal notes, docs, processes, etc., as new people joined the team, it became very apparent that we’d need to do a better job of updating it.

This is one of the processes I think we’ve benefited the most from. For example, as new Customer Support Agents have joined, they’ve been able to see how we do things, answers to common questions, and guides on all sorts of things. Same goes with the Development, Design, and Marketing team.

And everyone benefits from our newly created “HR” folder that has everything from the payment schedule to our Family Leave Policy (also new).

5. Product management

Since hiring two new developers in 2019 — we’re now at seven — we’ve also spent time cleaning up the way we use Trello. Previously, we had two boards: one for things we were currently working on, and one for our backlog of do’s that included bugs and tasks.

Since then, we’ve added a third for bugs and other tasks and removed those from our backlog. Now, our customer support folks can add any reported bugs directly into the “Bugs and Tasks” board.

This helps keep things more organized. It may seem obvious in retrospect, but when you’re fewer people, it’s often not necessary to separate things so much.

What hasn’t changed?

Just about everything else I can think of hasn’t changed. For me, it’s important to not make too many changes too quickly. Change is good, adapting to having more people is important, but I don’t want to rock the boat and mess up everything that’s been working so well up until now.

Before Podia, the largest team I’ve led was thirteen people, so this is definitely different, but as you often hear from experienced founders who have grown larger teams, it doesn’t really get harder as long as you’re working with great people and you stay organized.

I’m excited to see how things continue to change as we grow in size.

Have you ever vacationed with your entire family in a single house? I’ve always told Chris that I think the best time to spend with extended family would be in a neutral setting at a neutral time (no holidays please). This idea became a reality when my mom surprised us with an amazing gift.

My mom and aunts recently sold my grandparents’ house. With my mom’s portion of the sale she decided to take her family on a vacation. We joined my parents, two sisters and their husbands and kiddos in a beautiful three story home with a pool right on Bradenton Beach, FL. My Nana loved nothing more than being with all of her family so it was a wonderful way to honor her and my grandpa.

Anna Maria Island, Florida

Our days in Florida were slow and relaxing. Mornings were filled with coffee, cartoons, and taking in the view of the waves. The rest of the day was spent between the pool, beach, and foosball table! Lunches were simple sandwiches and fresh fruit. My brother-in-law rocked the grill at dinner time. And as the sun was about to set we would head to the beach to absorb the last of the sun’s rays.

We rarely left the property - a few trips to the beach wear and grocery stores filled our needs. Halfway through the week we had a girlie with ear pain at 1AM. We didn’t realize that my dad (with the dog) and sister (with the baby) were up as well. Had we known, Chris could have brought the dog and our nephew in the car when he made his late night run to Walgreens.

Sharing this vacation with my family allowed all of our relationships grow. We all helped each other out. My sisters would take N to the beach when the twins wanted to stay in the pool. I grabbed the baby when he woke up from his nap so my sister could stay on the beach a bit longer. Chris taught our two year old nephew the potato fries fist bump. The girls cuddled on the couch with my niece when they watched movies. And on a few nights the adults would stay up with a glass of wine and chat!

Before the week was over my sisters and I agreed that we would love to vacation like this again! It was the most relaxing, fun time we’ve spent with family. And while this trip was free thanks to my parents, we would gladly split the cost in the future because a week in paradise with my family was priceless.