“Holy cow! What’s gotten into our La-Z-Boy?”

For several hours, confusion reigned.

“CANNONBAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLL!”

Anatidaephobia: the fear that somewhere, somehow, a duck is watching you.

Darren’s heart quickened: Once inside the home, and once the demonstration was in full swing, a sale was inevitable.

“Can I look now?”

And for the rest of his life, Ernie told his friends that he had talked with God.

The Viking longcar was once the scourge of European roadways.

“New guy, huh? Well, up here, you walk the edge! And the edge is a fickle hellcat. … Love her, but never trust her, for her heart is full of lye!”

“This is it, Jenkins—indisputable proof that the Ice Age caught these people completely off guard.”

“Okay, okay, little Ahab. … Which one is it going to be?”

“Hello, Emily. This is Gladys Murphy up the street. Fine, thanks. … Say, Emily, could you go to your window and describe what’s in my front yard?”

Executioner understudies

“Look. If you’re so self-conscious about it, get yourself a gorilla mask.”

Another photograph from the Hubble Space Telescope

“Well, here he comes … Mr. Never-Makes-a-Dud.”

Mike Wallace interviews the devil.

“Excuse me, but must you smoke that foul thing around here?”

“Man, this is ugly—sheep and cattle never do mix well.”